Seven Questions to Pick Yourself Up When You’re Down

Have you ever had a day where you just felt very bland? I’ve recently had some days like that where like I felt stuck in neutral about what’s going on and I didn’t know why that was. Instead of accepting that feeling, I decided to ask myself probing questions to get reengaged and get out of my head.

Since I felt like things weren’t what I wanted them to be, I started by asking myself what I wanted my days to be then? Interestingly, when I started journaling about what I wanted to be doing, I saw that I had already created the space to be able to do it. I simply wasn’t. This honest dialogue with myself opened the door to asking more questions that would help me begin to understand where I was mentally and start to take action. Soon I was answering questions like, “What’s my motivation to do this?” “What’s going to help me moving forward that’s meaningful?” And, “What is it that I’m really looking for?”

Taking a step back helped me realize that I was beginning to put pressure on myself and was developing a feeling that I wasn’t doing enough. Whether it be writing, working in my sales territory, or meeting more people in town at Meetups, beating the drum to just do more of everything was not what I wanted. What I did want was for my process of creativity and connection to be an extension of who I am. Not just a checked box of what I did that day.

Eventually, I decided I should take advantage of an opportunity I have here and drove to the beach to spend some time by the ocean. Thinking about how grateful I am to see the view here and live where I do, I began to find something I was appreciative of while dealing with this gloomy emotion. As I began to reflect on the effort I’m putting into my days, I remembered the saying to “be a student of my results.” As I began listing what I’d accomplished this year, I started to realize when I did take action, I was getting the results I’d been looking for more consistently than I was giving myself credit for. That lead me to ask myself, why would I stop what I was doing if I was happy with the results of my initial actions?

Moving Forward

What began as a depressing feeling of going nowhere became a catalyst for necessary reflection for me. Realizing the roots that I’ve been planting of being purposeful with my actions, surrounding myself with positive and successful people, and being around the mindset of many impactful communities had changed my entire experience. Unfortunately, I hadn’t stopped to recognize the successes I was having along the way. Instead I was just doing and trying to add more to my list. I was creating a feeling that I wasn’t where I wanted to be. My planted roots are producing fruits of success and are what I came here to experience. I might need to spend more time reflecting and reviewing what I’ve done because I may initially feel bland or stuck in neutral, but after journaling and recording myself talking through this, I ended up feeling a lot more confident and optimistic about what I’ve been doing and the direction I’m going. That’s what I want. That’s what I’ve been looking for. That is what I didn’t know how to do when I was in Iowa and came to Florida to figure out. I initially came here to try new things and live the phrase, “fail forward.”

If you’ve ever lost that feeling of momentum or that “something is off”, it may be a good opportunity to look at what you’ve been doing and ask yourself about what you’re doing and if it’s really working for you. If it works, keep going with it. If it doesn’t work, look at what you did and the results you got and ask, what happened and why didn’t I get it? Review, then ready, fire, aim again. You may be further along than you realize, and change is already happening.

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What was most useful or valuable here for you in this blog post? Leave a comment below or send me your feedback to connect@wherethechangehappens.com.

Can I ask for your help? Where the Change Happens and After the Divorce: From Looking Back to Leaning In, could reach other readers like you by reading a helpful review on Amazon. Click here to leave your review for Where the Change Happens and here to review After the Divorce to help your community discover where they can begin to create meaningful change in their relationships today.

If you've enjoyed reading this blog post or find a useful idea, please share it with your friends and family. Your referral is greatly appreciated. I look forward to discovering where the change happens with you. You can also check out the Resources page for a full list of books I’ve read that I believe will inspire the change you would like to see in your journey. Be well and happy reading!

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